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How Far to go for Peace?

A story is told in Leviticus Rabbah 9:94:
Rabbi Meir used to hold regular classes in the synagogue every Sabbath eve. A certain woman was present who regularly came to listen to him.
On one occasion he went on later than expected. When she arrived home she found the lights out. Her husband asked her: “Where have you been?” She told him: "I have been listening to a class.” He replied: “You may not enter this house until you go and spit in the face of the teacher.”
Maybe her husband fears she has a crush on the rabbi?
Meanwhile, Rabbi Meir has elected to hold his class on a Friday night. Rabbi Meir witnesses this domestic exchange “through the Holy Spirit”. He understands that he brought about discord in the woman’s marriage, and responds to it the next day.
Rabbi Meir pretended to be suffering from pain in the eyes, and announced: “If there is any woman skilled in whispering charms for the eyes, let her come and whisper.” Her neighbours related this to her and said: “This is a chance for you to return home. Pretend you are a charmer and spit into his eyes [which was part of the charm].”
Here’s what happens next:
When she came to him he said to her: "Are you skilled in whispering charms for the eyes?" Daunted by his presence she answered in the negative. He said to her: “Never mind, spit into this eye seven times and it will get better." After she had spat he said: “Go and tell your husband: ‘You bade me do it only once; see, I have spat seven times!’”
The final scene of the story turns to Rabbi Meir and his students.
His disciples said to him: “Master! Are the words of the Torah to be treated with such contempt as this? Had you told us, would we not have sent and fetched the man and given him a flogging on the bench and forced him to become reconciled with his wife?”
Said he to them: “The dignity of Meir ought not to be greater than that of his Divine Master. If in the case of [the sotah ritual where] the Holy Name which is so sacred, the Torah orders that it is to be blotted out in water, in order to bring about peace between a man and his wife, what does the dignity of Meir matter?”

retold by Zahavit Shalev

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