A Soulful Journey

A  shadchan  was praising to a young man the charms of a young lady he was recommending to his notice.  ‘She is young, beautiful and rich,’ he declared. ‘Only,’ he admitted, ‘she has one blemish.  She is lame in one leg.’ ‘I am sorry, there is nothing…’ ‘But listen! Suppose you marry someone else. One day your wife slips on the stairs and breaks her leg.  You have nothing but expense.  You send for the doctor, there is an X-ray examination, perhaps she has to go to a nursing home, then there are a few weeks of convalescence in an expensive hotel at the seaside, you have to hire a housekeeper to look after you all that time – there is no end to the expense.  Take this girl and look what you save!” – Friday Nite Book Moral.  Be happy and do not look over your shoulder.

A groom grabs the shadchan (matchmaker) and hisses, "You faker!  You swindler!  This woman is old!  She is homely!  She lisps.  She squints!" "You don't have to whisper," he interrupts.  "She's deaf too."

A shadchan was discussing a certain young woman with a young man “But she is lame,” the fellow complained. “That is an asset,” the shadchan smiled, “for she won’t be able to run after you.” “She is blind,” the chap protested. “That is just fine.   She won’t see when you go out with other women.” “But she is mute!” “So what? I wish my husband would lose his tongue!” “People whisper that her mother is a wicked women.” “So? Do you intend on marrying her mother?” “But she is very ugly.” “That is good,” the shadchan replied. “You’ll have no fear that another will snatch her.” “But she is a hunchback,” the chap groaned. “You amaze me, young man,” the shadchan ejaculated jumping from the chair.   “Did you want her you be altogether perfect?” -The Friday Night Book