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Life's Rules (Not Really)

 1)  I learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

2)  When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

3)  I don’t understand why people say hurtful things like “Want to go for a run?” or “Try this kale.”

4)  "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."  Albert Einstein 


5)  Don’t believe what you see in the cartoons.  No matter how hard you throw a toilet plunger, it won’t actually stick to a someone’s face.  Don’t ask me how I know this.

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