A traditional Jew decides that all the mitzvot have become a burden, so he decides to convert to Christianity. The next morning, after his conversion, his wife sees him putting on his tefillin and she yells, "I thought you converted!" He responds by slapping his forehead and saying "Oy, a goyishe kop!" * A Wall Street financier becomes exceedingly wealthy, moves into a multimillion $ condo on Park Ave. and decides to have a housewarming. He invites his elderly Jewish mother but she never shows up. Very concerned, he calls her the first thing next morning: "Mom, I thought you were coming to my party. Where were you?" She replies, "I was in your lobby but I couldn't remember your name." * An (apocryphal) story was told by Groucho Marx about the banker Otto Kahn. Kahn was walking in New York with a friend who suffered from kyphosis. They passed a synagogue, and Kahn said, "You know, I used to be a Jew." The friend replied, ...